How to Deal with Feeling Lost in College

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UVA chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

Whether it be because of academics or social life, everyone has been at a point in their college careers where they felt lost and did not know how to get through it.

This isn’t going to be a straight cut guide of me telling you exactly what to do to stop feeling lost, but as someone who has gone through this many times in the last 3 years of college, and have continued to feel such feelings as a 4th year, I am here to help you out as much as I can by telling you about my own experience so that some of your feelings can hopefully be at ease.

My Experience In Community College

Before coming to UVA, I went to community college back home in Northern Virginia. The lifestyle there is super different from how it is here, not only socially, but also academically.

I started my first year by talking to different people in my classes, but no one seemed very interested in creating actual friendships, rather a classmate bond where all we did was help each other out on assignments and exchange brief conversations in class. Along with this, since everyone was a commuter student, most people would go to class and leave campus as soon as they could (I’m saying this from experience).

I was working at a boba shop in my local mall at the time, so a lot of my closest friends were my coworkers who also went to community college with me, and we would study together or hang out outside of campus. Near the end of my last semester in community college, I had a friend who joined the Asian Student Association at one of the campuses of our college and asked me if I wanted to come to some meetings with her. I was reluctant at first, but it was pretty fun, and it made me wish that I had branched out earlier than I did.

Academics wise, the people I encountered at community college were definitely not as strict as students I have seen here at UVA, but that is not to say that every class in community college is easy! What was easy was registering for classes because I could get a decent schedule even if I registered two days before the first day of classes. Thankfully, I knew what classes I wanted to take in order to properly transfer to UVA, so I had everything planned out and I did not have to worry about it too much.

Coming to UVA

The transition from going to community college versus UVA was… interesting to say the least. I never lived alone before, and finding housing was really tricky. Once that was sorted out, the only thing left was actually attending the school. I got lucky with another transfer as a roommate, so it was nice to have someone to be able to relate to.

I was extremely worried about how I was going to be able to assimilate socially since I would be coming in as a third year and that is usually when most people solidify their groups, but the only way I was going to combat that was to quite literally throw myself out there. I joined a bunch of different kinds of orgs, and went to any possible networking/bonding event possible. That way I could meet a lot of people and pick out exactly which groups I really wanted to be a part of. I am pretty extroverted, but tend to be slightly shy when first meeting people, so I really had to force myself to be the person to strike up conversation because I quickly realized that not everyone is going to start them for me. This was a huge reason for why I was able to get to know so many more people. I know that if I did not force myself to do that, I would have felt a lot more lonely throughout the year.

I am a Media Studies major on the Pre-Law track except I am not someone who has had a dream of being a lawyer my entire life. In fact, the drive really only began right before I began college. That’s why I got extremely scared coming to UVA and seeing just how driven everyone is, not just those on the pre-law track.

I knew I did not take advantage of any opportunities that may have been at my community college, and I simply felt behind. I steered away from pre-law events and tried my best to figure things out by myself, but to be honest, it became very difficult. I attempted to join Undergraduate Women in Law, but even though the girls were so sweet, I was still very intimidated by it. I am still in the process of trying to get used to this feeling of not knowing what I am doing and slowly figuring things out.

That’s why I wanted to write this; for anyone reading this who feels like they are lost in this big university or are feeling behind in their academic, social, or career life, just know that there are people who feel the same, too. You will find your place, but you have to try! Just know that it won’t be easy, but that’s a part of the process. I promise there is always a bright side :)